Come on……

I don’t like to go around criticizing people for promoting fun and fitness, but I will take umbrage to greed getting in the way of proper etiquette and then subsequently not using the money where it should have been used. While the 2011 Femme Fit event was a very cool concept to introduce new women to CrossFit as a sport and allow the top ladies to go head to head with the other heavy hitters, there were a couple things we did not like that will most likely reduce our chances of going back in 2012.

First, the entry fee went up $50 this year to $100 per entrant. That’s a bit steep considering the fact most TEAM events cost that amount for registration. When I think of one hundred ass smackers, I am thinking a good prize purse, set up and accomodations for the athletes. I dunno, perhaps I am a spoiled punk from my days racing in Europe on cow crap covered cobblestone roads with cold showers and small Fiat team cars for a quarter that amount, but then having an ass kicking trophy or prize purse despite that. Times are hard and California still lags far behind in the “recovering” recession, so unless your independently wealthy, I don’t think most people have a hundred bucks running out of their ass. I will play devil’s advocate though and acknowledge that the event was held at a high school and I am sure the fee for permits, waivers and property lease probably wasn’t cheap, but…..

When you get a gym like ours that had 8 women register at the above rate, you stand to make a decent chunk of change off of that particular fellow CrossFit affiliate. So, when one of your athletes pulls out for personal reasons with a month to go, you’d think it would be okay to sub a new athlete in her place. Wrong!

After countless emails to cyberspace several weeks ago, we finally got a terse reply that stated all refunds and entries to the event were finalized as of July 15th. Also, no substitutions would be allowed. That response finally came with one week left to the event….

So, we got to tell the substitute athlete, who would have done very well at the event and was prepped for it, that she can no longer go – that sucks some major you know what. It tends to irk the Cat and Crazy Ivan a bit more when the offender is another affiliate and then won’t reply back to our pleading response and then we hear some other athletes were allowed a late registration for certain reasons.Very classy…

So, we packed the bags and drove to lovely Martinez to compete and make the best of it. The facility worked out well as they utilized the track to host the majority of the events and allowed everyone to camp out in the grassy infield area. However, bathrooms would soon be an issue. There were only 5 portapotties for a whole slew of nervous women with small bladders and a bunch of grunting males walking around all day. Most of you are acutely aware that a public restroom with 20 women’s stalls in it still has a line a mile long out of it, so there’s no way 100 competitors and a ton of spectators were going to make 5 portables work. Toilet paper was gone very quickly, the “nasty-o-meter” was pegged at 10 in no time, and the damn walk down and back up a 300 meter hill was getting old. Most people ended up resorting to making the most of the backside of some large storage containers on the north side of the track. Hey wait a minute, didn’t 100 athletes pay $100?

Once the event started to wind up towards start time, the event organizer announced that any waitlisted athletes would now be allowed to compete as all check-in’s were closed and whatever open slots were left from no shows could now be filled. Hold your goddamn horses, Skippy! Did I just hear that you were allowing subs in the place of paid athletes on game day? I’m sorry, come again?! I believe we were told no subs and we sure weren’t told there would be a wait list. So, let me get this straight, we paid $100 for this?

Then there’s the announcer. This guy decides his size makes him arrogant enough to talk down to people. I loved the way he would condescendingly tell people to clear the track or do things. That was rad. It was even radder when Mike, part of our support crew, asked him where the “unknown distance” trail run would be finishing so he could get finish line pictures. The announcers response was simply a disgusted look, a shrug of the shoulders and turning away from Mike with nary a word. It’s probably our bad though, it was apparently very secret and Mike probably didn’t pay the $100….

The events were pretty cool though. I liked the unknown distance run, the max Clean, and the DL/box Jump/Swing WOD. The 100m sprints were cool, but most athletes only got one run and then were pulled. Only a couple from each heat went into the final 100m sprint, so if you weren’t fast enough and didn’t make that final sprint, you could lose a lot of places even though you would continue to the final event. The final was 400m followed by burpees, a sandbag out and back carry, more burpees and then a final 400m. I friggin’ hope you like running and if you don’t you sure will by day’s end.

With people pissing in the weeds, an uneven dirt warm up area, an akward scoring system, and a very rutted football field to run across with an 80 Lb sandbag slung over you, it was definitely interesting. Still, the final event was a good wrap up and we got to see Jennie Labaw (very high on the Crazy Ivan “A” list) absolutely kill the final event by about 45 seconds taking the days fastest time away from Jennie Mckernan. That was seriously cool…no joke, it was.

Once it was all said and done, the organizers decided they’d had enough for the day and told folks the results would be posted on the internet and the top 3 in the Open and age groups would be mailed their medals. The same medals they had out on the tables at registration. It’s not like there was a valid reason not to award people their hard fought places. Women don’t have a ton of “Female Only” events and I thought it was rad that this was a perfect venue for them to shine in front of their own hot, sweaty, finely muscled, scantily, Lululemon clad kind (yeah, okay I just wanted to stare some more, but come on, what guy in their right mind wouldn’t?!?! We paid a lot of money dammit!!).

Seriously though, the women who competed and made it into the top 3 should have been recognized. That was a slap in the face in my book and was unprofessional as hell. I don’t care if the school told you to be out of there at a certain time, tell everyone to meet on the street corner for crying out loud or do it by flashlight in the dark, but recognize the women that came out as a whole as well as the top 3. These women were inspiring to watch as there were elite athletes and  rank beginners there all just enjoying each other’s company and having fun. None of them complained or made a drama scene out of anything – they just had fun (There weren’t even any cat fights, although if there were, I WOULD gladly pay $100 for front row seats). These female athletes were there to represent a select few women who have stepped out of the norm insofar as staying fit, strong, healthy and beautiful, goddamn recognize them as they deserved it! Last I remember they paid $100 each, I think they deserve a little bit of face time in front of everyone for that!

The concept is sound, but the organization and subsequent professionalism needs some work. I am not bitter, but I call it as I see it. Being snubbed and then seeing favorites being played out or other shenanigans go on that make me wonder where our money went leaves me curious. The few vendors and sponsors that did come out weren’t acknowledged all that well and the prize packages were a bit shy of what I expected $10k to cover. I saw them on the table… next to the medals….maybe they’ll get mailed to the top 3 women….

I am proud of our CFC ladies for going there, having fun, kicking ass and representing the gym like they did. I am also very proud of each and every one of the other female athletes for going out there and doing the same for themselves and their respective gyms all the while smashing preconceived notions and redefining fit, beautiful and healthy.

Awesome work, CrossFit ladies!